Grief support groups and grief counselling are widespread and undoubtedly highly variable. Little information is available related to support group and counselling outcome. There is specific controversy regarding the importance of confronting the death (also called “grief work”) in the early phase of grief. In one study (Stroebe), investigators developed a measure to assess the extent to which individuals confronted or avoided their loss and used scores on this instrument to predict outcomes at later times. They found that low scores for widows did not influence outcome, but low scores for widowers predicted poorer outcome. There is some evidence that the occurrence of symptoms of major depression in the first month following the death predicts a worse course later, especially for suicidality bereaved individuals (e.g., Jordan, 2001).
It goes without saying that the loss of a close relationship permanently affects the bereaved person. It is not reasonable to think that one can recover from such a loss or resolve the loss. Such a loss is permanent and has permanent effects on the bereaved. Still, it is possible and important that the bereaved person eventually have comforting memories of the deceased and feel interested in and able to engage in life. Weiss (1993) provides a list of reasonable expectations we can have for the bereaved. A person who has lost someone should eventually have:
(1) The ability to give energy to everyday life.
(2) Psychological comfort, or freedom from pain and distress.
(3) The ability to experience satisfaction and gratification in life.
(4) Hopefulness for the future.
(5) The ability to function adequately in a range of social roles.
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